Hi. My name is Tony and this is Every Frame a Painting. And I know exactly what you're thinking: Why am I talking about this guy? — Oh my god, you're Michael Bay! — Oh my god, I am Michael Bay. Because I don't like his films and yet I think it's crucial to study them.
Why? — ...and Paul, I think you have started to watch WrestleMania on television... — Well, I... — Because you must not avert your eyes: this is what is coming at us. this is what what television, what a collective anonymous body of majority wants to see on television. Like WrestleMania, like Anna Nicole Smith, like Jackass, Michael Bay has created something. — Spectacle this website! It's what people want. The Romans new it, Louis Quatorze knew it, Wolfowitz knows it. — One, two, three... Boom! Bayhem!! We may find it crass and vulgar, but if we're going to make better movies, we have to understand the images that are coming at us. — Hey, hey!! So let's talk about Bayhem. Is it a unique use of film form? If you want to understand Michael Bay, one of the best ways is to watch his copycats. Consider this shot from 'Battleship', which tries to do that circular camera move he's famous for. Doesn't work here. Why? It's actually really simple. First, there's no background, except for blue sky. Without a background, we don't get parallax, so the shot doesn't feel like it's moving. See the difference? On top of that, the lens is wrong. Bay frequently shoots these shots with a telephoto lens, which compresses the space. This makes the background whizz by. Third, the actor's just staring and turning his head, but the key to the Bay version is that the actors move vertically. Like here. And here. And last, the low angle is there to give us the scale and slow motion is there to sell it. So what we have here in the Bay's shot is multiple types of movement, integrated: movement of the camera, movement of the background, movement of the actors, expansion of time. Then they stand still and look off-screen, creating stillness. Even though you're looking at a stationary point in the frame, this shot feels huge. — Shit just got real. Breakdown any Michael Bay's shot and that is basically what you will see: layers of depth, parallax, movement, character and environment to give this sense of epicness. None of these techniques is particularly unique. In fact, most cinematographers will naturally create depth in their images and parallax, whenever the camera moves. And the Hero Shot is everywhere. What makes Bay unique is how many layers and how complex the movement is. That doesn't make his shots better, it just makes them more complicated than the competition. That's why his frames seem to have a lot of stuff going on. Lots of dust, dirt, smoke or explosions between the layers. Also, lamp-posts. Lots of lamp-posts. If you go back to the first Bad Boys, you can watch this from the opening credits. Here, the car moves one way, the plane another, the lamp-posts are in frame for scale and the camera is on a telephoto lens. Later in the film, you can see the same compositional techinique. And when the explosions happen... Once you see this, it's much easier to deconstruct his imagery and to see its limits. For instance, Bay doesn't distinguish between when to do a shot and when not to do it. He'll use the same camera movement, whether the charachter's saying something important... — You have any money here in the States? .. or total gibberish... — What did I say?! Did you hear what I said? I heard what I said 'cause I was standing there when I said it. Every shot is designed for maximum visual impact, regardless of whether it fits. But the Bay style also leads to some fascinating visual ideas. How can you make something feel big?
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All the way around. Cause that is the guard. Josiah: Get ready Josiah: Dude, you better get ready to just... get your gun and shoot all the way across this.. Josiah: Take the shot, take the shot now. Now's your chance!
Guard: STOP IT! *BANG BANG* Josiah: Get ready, the pager is gonna be delayed slightly. Josiah: Now Uncle Ethan: *Yawn* Aw man, I'm tired.. Josiah: Listen to what the guy tells you. Josiah: Listen to it, word-for-word. Radio Man: Man if that pager goes off again, i'm gonna have to sound the alarm. For real. Josiah: What'd he say? What? Josiah: What'd the guy say? He said, somethin somethin somethin... i'm gonna have to sound the alarm Josiah: One more time, that means that there's no more guards. *HEAVEN MUSIC* *GASP* *GASP PT.2* Jesus Christ! Josiah: Yeah I know, it's a heart attack. Josiah: But now listen up. Here's what you gotta do, you ready? There's no more guards! Josiah: Yeah There's no more guards! I killed the bank manager, I killed that guard, there- there's no one left! Josiah: Yeah, but no no no All I have to do is I have to just drop a grenade in the lobby and i'm good! Josiah: No, hold up. First, quietly kill the people in the back. So don't go that way. Okay, alright. Josiah: Here, go down that stairwell. Josiah: Kill him. *BAYUM* Josiah: Now someone's up behind that wall I bet *HUMMING NOISES* *BAYUM* Josiah: T- Kill the tellers, now. You gotta run. No they didn't notice. Josiah: Go through that door and just kill 'em Josiah: Kill everyone, now (way too lazy to caption this whole part. sorry) HOW COULD I- *FRUSTRATION NOISES* I- Was there anything I could've done Josiah? Josiah: Not really *WHEEZE* Josiah: Not really anything at all! Josiah: Just get- Just git gud Just git gud *monotone* Where are the police officers.. Where are the police officers. Josiah: There they are.. Josiah: Wait are you surrendering? Josiah: Are you surrendering? Jesus Dragan! No! No! I'm sur- What have you done!?!?!?!?!?!?! Arrest me! Arrest me, it wasn't me! It wasn't me. You can arrest me! You can arrest me. I'll just, I'll get in the back. *BAYUM* Josiah: You killed them No I didn't Huh, we're done! We can just rob the bank now. Josiah: But- Dumbo? Bimbo? Boh Boh n' Oh Boh Huh. What? *some sort of laugh* *GASP* It's open! Doo do do Doooo (victory noises?) Well that's simple enough Gimme! Gimme! How much are we talking here? Hundred seventy seconds, okay I can work with that Hila- every time, she just has to know what i'm doing! Why her? Why- Wh- Watch, if I walk over here.. And I start sniffing the flowers. Give it 20, 30 seconds and she'll show up Look! LOOK AT WHAT I SAID. LOOK IT! What- what's so special about the painting Hila? Hila? Hila? What????? I guess she just really likes the paintings here. Clearly, sh- *FRIGHTENED* I'm sorry- I can put it back- I can put it back. I can- I can put it back I can put it back... I'm sorry Hila. *HAPPY NOISES* AND AH BA BAAAA *Beautiful Singing* Come on Hila, let's go! Get the HeCK back there Grab the money! That's it? Josiah: Yeah $517,000???? Gosh, we're talkin Lamborghini Aventadors, each and every single one of these Hila! Look at this! Look at this! I swear to god she doesn't care about anything! Nothin but her stupid paintings. (Every caption done by Fly2Freedom. I spent three hours on this. You're welcome.) (Every caption that doesn't have a name attatched to it is MeLikeBigBoom.) I think if we recognize the problems that went last time, we can be more... ...well equipped for this time around. So we need to rob the bank.
Josiah: Yes. They've got gold in the safe. I want the gold. Josiah: Yes !!!!11!!1!!! ...Jesus Christ. But last time what were the issues- So, I... I couldn't grab the pager, that was stupid, that was just Payday Josiah: Ehh, no you just suck. And then there was the- the teleportation, well we fixed that. We downloaded this locomotion mod that makes the- (loses focus because the mod is so good) This is so much better. I cannot believe it. Okay... and ummm That's it. That's both of our problems! So I think we can just.. I think we can just run in and just.. rob the bank. Okay, so first thing we have to figure out where the safe is. There's the safe And... There's a security guard (beep) Shut up!1! Where's the security office? Where's... Josiah: Over there. uhp.. Hi.. Umm That's the bank manager. Ummm There's the Security office, that's super easy, this door is shut. Okay Hi.. Umm Hello Umm And that means that this door over there must be open, so... We need to kill the manager and get the security.. card. Josiah: The card might be in his office, which is directly to your l- like right there pretty much -Card here..? Yes, it is! Josiah: Can- Do you have the skill to grab it? Try to grab it. Josiah: No you don't have that skill- No I do not.. okay. Josiah: But you know where it is! Um... he left (Message from the caption person, i have no clue what either of them said, have a nice day) Josiah: Okay... just, you can try to sneak your way to the card... right now. Should I put the m- okay So I'll put the mask on and then.. Josiah: Yeah Josiah: Put your- (Interrupted by H3H3 or Ethan): MaSk Oh yeah, I forgot I got a suppressed pistol which will make things a lot easier now Pew Pew Pew Pew *STRUGGLE NOISES* Police Guard: FREEZE *SHOOTING INTENSIFIES* *RELOADING* *EMERGENCY ECM JAMMER* *ALARM NOISES* Josiah: HahaHa- Dude the page- the pagers are on! Alright, we- we can- we can do better. We ca- *WHEEZE* Josiah: Security office is over here Dirty. Josiah: Just see, if the- oh wait, look, That's the- that's the guy right there Yeah the bank manager right there? Josiah: Yeah Josiah: Go see if the card is there. If it's not, it's on him. And if it's on him just murder him. Josiah: It's on him, MURDER HIM (Discovers something new) Oh, you click it. Do you hold it? Is that how you sprint? Josiah: Yeah Hold it, sprint- oh shoot Oh! Josiah: *GASP* Hello Josiah: (wtf does he say to begin this sentence) Josiah: Here's what you do, you break the camera right now and then kill the guy (MeLikeBigBoom's FaZe Clan montage) Josiah: You better hurry, there's a guard coming (OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO) That was.. Josiah: Grab the keycard. Josiah: Ok now get ready there's a guard coming. Alright come around the corner (translation: come fight me noob) Josiah: Grab your melee Grab my melee? Josiah: Yeah! Shank him! Stab and shoot. Stab shoot. Ssssstab shoot. Stab shoot- Or shoot stab? Josiah: Stab shoot Okay, stab shoot Josiah: Now STAB SHOOT That worked amazing! Wow.. ok Uncle Ethan: I don't feel safe control. I think that we need to ditch our guns for swords... GREAT Swords... Wouldn't that be badass? Radio Person: Ohh I see... I see. Radio Person: Okay, that checks out. Okay that checks out That was probably pointless to bag him. Josiah: No it's actually good- no, nonono, but it behind it. Because if a guard actually does come.. Yeah.. I thought it would make a good ornament. But this guy, what should I do with this guy? Josiah: Ehh, leave him. Actually I have an idea. (?) (OH GOD WHY) Should I shoot the camera? Josiah: Nooo because then everyone in the lobby will know Josiah: You just- you literally- you have to walk up and use your key card on the door Josiah: As quick as possible Well i'm just gonna sprint in (BANG BANG SKEET SKEET) *HEAVY BREATHING* Josiah: *GASP* Now, now, go! Pop Pop Pop! Bang Bang Skeet Skeet! Uncle Ethan: Oh, I think my battery's running low. I'll have to replace it after my shift Radio Man: Oh, just a second, let me check that. Josiah: Are you not able to bag him up? Josiah: Yeah, you don't, ok so go all the way around right now Josiah: You have to find the last guard. Josiah: And then you're gonna put down an ECM and kill everyone. Josiah:But you have to find the last guard. He's on the other side, I bet. Josiah: Go. Run around right now Josiah: Not that way. Josiah: Outside, boi Well, why would he be outside? Josiah: No, you run to the other side of the bank. But- then i'm gonna be leaving this guy. Josiah: It's okay, but if you do this quickly Josiah: Oh shoot. Josiah: ECM NOW. Josiah: Go upstair- go around. Ever wished that you could play a certain song because you liked it but couldn't because you didn't know how to read its music sheets? Or have you ever wanted to just learn music but couldn't because you just didn't have the time or money to spare? If you still haven't heard the latest news on how to learn music online then this might just be the right solution for you. With its innovative ways, learning music online is no longer a dream.
Learning music isn't as hard as you may think. Of course, when you're a beginner and you watch someone perform, you'd probably think that it would be impossible for you to learn how to play like that but that's where you're wrong. Information about every aspect of music can be found on the net for free. Not only is there tons of info on music theory but there are also lots of exercises for you to practice in order to master each aspect. Assignment essay service woll help with your essay about music. With today's technology, an increasing number of websites are teaching music through the use of programs and software. By using videos and audio files, you can actually learn how the song will sound like and how your hands should move according to the music sheets. Some software can even help you compose your own songs as you improve. And if you ever have trouble with learning the basics, there are programs available, which are made to help you, progress at your pace. Moreover, learning music online can also turn out to be very fun. It is actually quite common these days to find music games. These games are usually made to help teach or interest youngsters to want to learn music online. How it works is actually quite simple. Most of the time all you are required to do is click through a link and it will lead you to the online music game that you want to try. There are also downloadable versions of the games, which can be stored onto your computer. You can also learn music online through courses and lessons by exchanging e-mails with a teacher from an online school. For people who are music students and love music, a career in the musical field can be very satisfying because they get to turn their passion into their profession. Specifically, for those students who are considering this, degree programs in music and audio are also available online for further education. Music may seem like a complete different language when you don't know how to read it but once you get the hang of it, it's actually quite simple to understand. Even if you just want to learn one song because you like it or you just want to learn something new, anyone who practices enough can become good or decent at any musical instrument. Adult career education is the most significant sector of the entire industry which has been built up around adult education, and it is growing in size due to the difficulties people are having finding work when they lose jobs due to the worldwide economic depression. There are many opportunities for anyone who wants to develop their skills, but the difficulty is being able to find funding for the courses you want to take part in. the introduction of online learning has at least meant that it is possible to study while retaining your present source of income.
Many industries are finding it extremely difficult to recruit enough quality employees, due to the strict educational requirements which are in place. The most extreme example of this is the health industry, where doctors and surgeons obviously need to be trained to the highest degree. There is a greater demand for health services than ever before, and the resources of doctors are stretched to the limit despite the fact that they are handing off any work which does not require these high level of skills to assistants. Training for the many people who are wanting to change careers and break into medicine is one way of coping with the crisis. There is no such legal requirement for a high level of education in business, but companies will still use the level of someone's education as a way of separating candidates who are worthy of consideration from those who are rejected outright. Companies are able to be more selective than they have ever been before, and there was always a tendency for the top jobs to be given to those with an MBA qualification, rather than those with the most impressive real world experience. Even if you are many years into your business career and have a great resume written by a professional resume editor, it is still worthwhile to improve your education profile. Taking vocational adult career education is a necessity rather than a choice if you work with modern technology, especially if you work in the software or programming sector. There are constant new developments which affect the way repairs to hardware need to be carried out, and if your company upgrades its equipment in one go you will need to be ready to deal with the situation. Programming is liable to change even more quickly, and everyone who becomes a programmer knows that they will need to constantly attend refresher courses to keep up with the current trends. This type of vocational training is more common and more freely available than ever before. There is only one factor stopping everyone getting the training they would want, and that is the question of funding. If you are employed by a company, they may be prepared to fund training which will bring you up to date with work you are already doing. People who do not have a current position in the industry in which they want to train will usually need to be prepared to finance their own training, although there are limited grants available for certain disadvantaged groups. Finding suitable adult career education places has never been easier, due to the ease with which information can be shared over the Internet. Even local college places are easier to find, because the courses are listed in full on the websites along with entry requirements. There are also many college courses which are available to be studied online, and these can be accessed no matter which part of the country you live in. Having an existing career is no longer a barrier to study, and distance issues or living in a rural area are no bars to adult career education. I love getting up early.
This morning I am on watch from 4 – 6am. Being the watch keeper essentially means that I am responsible for the ship and generally making sure that all is well onboard and sitting on the bridge at this time of the morning is great especially as you get to see some amazing sun rises! The following is my personal log book entry so you can see what it's like to be on watch aboard a superyacht. 03:55am – Relieve the second engineer of watch duty. Arrive five minutes early for my shift to allow for the change to bridge conditions. 04:00am – Check current wind speed, wind direction, sea height and visibility readings. 04:10 am – Quickly pop down to the crew mess to knock up a coffee. 04:15 am – Walk down to the engine room to check the bilges and the ship's alarm log. There are no new alarms and all seems to be well. Take another sip of coffee to celebrate. 04:20am – Take ship to shore sight bearings. Notice a small yacht on starboard side – nothing to worry about for the moment but will keep an eye on it. 04:30 am – Check line of sight bearings for movements. No changes to original bearings. Sweet. 04:45 am – The sun is rising now and beginning to shift the dark night sky to a light blue colour. 05:00am – It’s quite a cool feeling to be sitting on the bridge of a super yacht and filling out the chief officer's log book for the first time. - Barometer reads 1017 and holding. - Wind is steady at around 7 knots. - Sea is calm at 1-2 feet. - Visibility is good with objects visible up to 7 nautical miles. -Sky is partly cloudy. 05:05 am – Walk around the decks and confirm that tender is secured. Check line of sight bearings for movements. Small yacht on starboard side is holding position. 05:15am – Sun is rising steadily now. The sky is changing to a light orange and blue colour. A near perfect sunrise! 05:20am – A small yacht sets sail on port side. Looks like a single man sailing – wonder where he is going but then realise I don’t really care, as it can’t be much better than where I am right now. 05:25 am – Quickly pop on to my Facebook account. Remind myself to attend Facebook Addicts Anonymous meeting when next ashore. 05:30am – Clouds are appearing on the horizon and slightly ruining my perfect sunrise. Unlucky. 05:35 am – Wind has changed direction now and the yacht is shifting direction on anchor. Walk the decks to make sure this shift in direction has not put us too close to the small yacht on our starboard. 05:45am – Shift in wind speed and anchor line has not put us at risk. We’re all good. 05:50 – The sky is really bright now, looks like it's going to be another scorcher on the French Riviera. 05:55 am – Check engine room bilges. No new alarms. Macy Gray playing on the sound system… 06:00 – Hand over to the 1st mate. Complete new entry on the chief officer's log book with current weather and ship status. 06:05 – Head back to bed to get some much needed rest. Another charter day today so will be another 14 hour day at least! |
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December 2018
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